Nautical Theological Relativism

Isaac: “Spongebob’s Jesus is bad.”
Richard: “Um, I don’t think Jesus is in Spongebob.”
Isaac: “His Jesus is.  You know, the guy with the stick with three points.”
Richard: “You mean Poseidon?”
Isaac: “Yeah, that’s his Jesus.”
[sound of Isaac being awarded Vanderbilt M.Div]